One blessing after another
James 1:17 Every good and perfect gift is from above.It is funny the way that God does things in such unexpected ways. You see had I planned out my life I would have never known or planned this the way that it came to me. However the way it has come to me has been perfect. Even now I can't stop smiling.
Lately Phil and I have meditated on this verse;
Colossians 1:7 He is before all things, and in him all things hold together.
It was our meditation that we would grow closer to the Lord as we grew closer to one another. We knew in our hearts what the Lord had confirmed but questions remained. These were questions that would be answered on a foggy night.
That Sunday started like any other for me. I got up in Oswego and went to church. I arrived early and practiced with the worship team. I got to lead two songs. I sat back down and listened to a sermon and we had a coffee hour for a perspective new pastor. I had a doughnut with chocolate frosting. I was questioned, as I had been for quite sometime, I was asked, "Are you nervous?", "What do you think it will be like".
I had grown to accept these questions and the idea that I could not really know what it would be like. I had also grown accustomed to the strangeness of the idea. I however knew I couldn't explain it away. When God gives you a peace about things you just know.
So after church I returned to my house. I hung out with my friend Heather. I did some last minute cleaning. I picked out some cute outfits and packed. We said goodbye. I drove home to Adams. I cleaned the parents house. I waited.
I called Phil several times that night. He was driving up to visit me for spring break with friends who had before he had known of me wanted to have a road trip to NY. They had run into fog. The night before they had to drive an hour back to pick up his wallet which had been left at a gas station. Delays made the 8 o clock meeting time turn into later and later. My plan was to meet him at the local playground, having him follow a map. As it approached 12:30 he phoned from somewhere near Central Square. I was sleepy. I threw that plan out. I gave him directions to my house from the exit and told him I would be on the couch and if I fell asleep to wake me up. I didn't actually think I could fall asleep.
Around 1:30 I felt a tap and thought the cat was joining me on the couch. She wasn't. I looked up. I saw his face. This time it wasn't a dream. I got up off of the couch and I hugged him. He hugged me back. He was real. This was real.
The rest of the week was a blur. I got to know his friends who had come along. They were cool. I also got to know about his expressions. More about the way he is.
I learned one of the important things about love is the way that you must force yourself back to a childlike abandon. It is suddenly ok to be taken care of. Things like personal space are no longer important. Things like being independent are secondary. Just like when I was five i desired to have my hand held, my food shared, someone to hold me. Someone to buy me ice cream. Someone to sing me to sleep, to kiss my cheek goodnight.
We vistited with his family and mine. His aunt and cousins and Grandma came over for turkey dinner. We watched a lot of movies. We caught up on the time we had missed just enjoying each others company. We still prayed for one another each night.
In the back of my head I knew he had to go at the end of the week but I also knew it wouldn't be goodbye forever.
On the last morning we drove up on a hill and we watched the sunrise. We ate truffles and we listened to Frank Sinatra. We knew we were running out of time. He drove back to my house and played me my song. I wanted time to stand still. We said goodbye in the house, I was sobbing, I put him in his car. I knew that the Lord would give us grace. I still didn't know it would hurt so much.
Then again I didn't know I could know Joy like this...
Colossians 3:14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.
John 1:16From the fullness of his grace we have all received one blessing after another.
and the Love story continues....but I am not the author.
posted by Kate @ 3/19/2006 07:38:00 PM
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